Dearest reader,

So last week I had a complete breakdown, and I feel so seperate from myself. Food has been my only comfort and as you’ll know its a double edged sword. I got this week off work from my GP because its clear to everyone that I am not myself at the moment. To make matters better, Big Red has indeed visited town! And to put it softly, this bitch has a GUN!! This morning I woke up bleeding and with a stomach ache from hell. I couldn’t sit, or move, I was just curled up in pain. I genuinely think they should’ve cured periods by now… but that’s a rant for another time.

I’ve been watching Steven universe and drinking enough orange juice to become an orange. Since I can’t really make it out of my bedroom at the moment. I’ve just been scrolling through pinterest. I fell into the most beautiful rabbit hole full of all the things I love, pink, cutesie, Y2K, fashionista. All that fabulosity inspired me to create my own bedroom in this style.

Here you can see the bedroom that I redesigned. I think it’s from My Scene but I can’t really say. It’s a pic I nicked from Pinterest. I filled my dream room full of everything I want and love. That heel chair is 1000% on the wishlist.

I’m currently in this state of limbo where I don’t feel like myself, I don’t recognise myself and I’m trying to be hopeful that when all this sadness, fear and change has passed that i’ll be able to make my space as pretty and bright as this dream room. I want to change my life, I want to become my dream self in my dream room. I guess this doodling is a form of manifestation?

Or maybe its just a doodle.

Yours, (confused and suffering a belly ache)

Isabisa (っ˶ ˘ ᵕ˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶ς)